Why selfies should be banned

Okay, this is officially getting ridiculous.

Last week, a grandma had to be rescued from sea after floating away on an ice flow… which she had climbed on top of, to get a selfie.

She damn near floated away into the open ocean and had to be fetched by the Icelandic Coast Guard, and it was all in search of an epic photo.


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This week, a woman has been attacked by a jaguar after she climbed over a barricade at the Wildlife World Zoo near Phoenix, Arizona to take a selfie with the animal.

What on earth did she expect would happen?! The jaguar would see her climb into to its safe, sacred habitat and then siddle over for a snuggle?

Fortunately, the woman survived with minor injuries, and the zoo posted on Twitter at the time: “We can promise you nothing will happen to our jaguar. She’s a wild animal, and there were proper barriers in place to keep our guests safe – [it’s] not a wild animal’s fault when barriers are crossed. Still sending prayers to (the woman) and her family.”

But, here’s the thing about these insanities: they keep happening. Again, and again, and again.

Wikipedia is keeping a catalogued list – and it’s not short – outlining known selfie-related injuries and deaths over the last few years, and some of the cases are downright mind-boggling.

As if “death by selfie” isn’t enough, we also have to grapple with “death of self-esteem by selfie”.

Which is to describe that particular feeling you get when someone posts a selfie, and they look exponentially hotter than you’ve ever seen them in real life. There’s a good reason for this: it’s probably not a real photo.

Apps like FaceTune have made it possible for everyday punters to enjoy “glossy magazine level” photoshopping on their everyday images. We’re talking, smoother pores, brighter eyes, shinier skin, plumper lips. The works.

And it’s insane.

What is that saying again: The definition of insanity is doing the same thing, but expecting a different result?

The more we embrace selfie culture, the more this insanity continues. It’s high time we start calling this nonsense out for what it is.

#bantheselfie

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