Cooking the books

I had a few minutes to spare on the weekend so I did a quick run through of the State’s account ledgers and sliced $73.6 billion off the reputed $80 billion debt.

So everyone can relax now, I’ve fixed it.

I didn’t even have to sack anyone.


‘You fix the budget’, is the catchphrase for the so-called ‘People’s Budget’.

The Newman Government has launched the $6 million campaign to urge Queenslanders to do the work we elected them to do, namely, reduce the debt and manage a budget.

The interactive website – – where you can choose tax increases, spending cuts and asset sales is accompanied by a strange, trance-inducing video.

Don’t click on play. Just don’t.

I suddenly found myself writing delirious comments on news websites extolling the greatness of Sir Campbell and his adorable wardrobe of striped shirts.

In the spending cuts section there were, not surprisingly, options to sack more public servants and to freeze their pay for three years.

Strangely, I could not find an option for ‘freeze politicians pay’.

The $6 million campaign of television, radio and full page newspaper ads comes on top of the $20,000 per month the Government is reportedly paying a private communications firm to convince Queenslanders that asset sales is a good thing.

Where is the big plan the LNP promised they had during the election campaign to get things under control?

Is the Government completely out of ideas about what to do about the financial situation or is it a bit of propaganda trickery designed by that very expensive PR firm to convince Queenslanders they have no choice but to sell off the farm?

Here’s a clue.

Treasurer Tim Nicholls was quick to emphasize the website was not a poll – meaning the choices Queenslanders make on it will not be audited and will not be binding.

“It’s basically an opportunity for all Queenslanders to walk a day in the shoes of the treasurer and look at the choices we face as a government,” Mr Nicholls said.

So it means absolutely nothing.

Which is a shame because I had their budget woes fixed.


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